Posts tagged life
Posts tagged life
So, this is something I’ve been thinking about for a while, and it’s finally time to do it.
I have always known, at the back of my mind, that Tumblr is really bad for my mental health. It’s a combination of the sheer speed and volume of posts appearing on your dash, the impersonal design of the site, and the misery-inducing content of a lot of the posts I encounter. It’s got to the point that I’m feeling depressed and apathetic pretty much all day, overwhelmed and hopeless.
I’ve taken long breaks from Tumblr in the past, and this tends to have a good effect. I think, for the sake of my own sanity, I’m going to have to do that until I’ve submitted my PhD. I’m using Tumblr as a sort of dumping-ground for all the negative emotions I’m feeling, and then exacerbating them by being bombarded, constantly, with all the horrors people face in their everyday lives, vicious arguments that ensue when people post about such horrors and just general toxic negativity. The fun conversations and the fandom blogs do not outweigh this, unfortunately.
I’m not disappearing from the internet, but I’m reverting back to platforms which make me feel good about myself, and life. If you want to stay in touch, chances are you’re already friends with me on Facebook. If you’re not, I’m also on:
Livejournal (this is a mirror of the Dreamwidth blog
So feel free to stay in touch via any of those sites.
I will be back, but not for at least three months. See you around.
My last post reminded me of my undergrad days and how I had these ridiculous crushes on half the guys who were heavily involved in theatresports, revues and improv, back when my type was Arrogant Snarky Hipster.
OH UNDERGRAD, I DO NOT MISS YOU AT ALL!
My boyfriend is watching German football and I have mead so everything is okay.
We’re having a Youtube party and playing ALL THE RIHANNA.
Ugh, depression is just the absolute worst.
I have accumulated, over the years, a dual collection of tags. Everything I post gets a tag that actually names it for what it is (e.g., posts about Romanitas are tagged #romanitas and posts about childhood are tagged #life and #childhood) as well as an allusive, pretentious tag that’s often a quotation (e.g., posts about Romanitas are tagged #save yourself from that if you think you can and posts about childhood are tagged #when i was a child the world seemed so wide). I’ve also been gradually working out tags for significant people in my life, although as my relationships to those people change, the tags may change too, as the meanings of the old quotes and allusions may no longer apply.
I’ve been doing this since my earliest Livejournal days, but the system has been developing gradually, so some of the earlier tags have been replaced, or I didn’t know the right words to use for something in the beginning and only chose what tag to use later.
I put quite a lot of effort into my blogging, wherever it is posted, and I like things to be consistent, and what I really should do is go back through all my blogs and edit the tags, but it’s going to be a ridiculous amount of work and very time-consuming, so I put it off and put it off.
And, to be honest, who even notices my tags but me? To whom do they have meaning but me? Is it really worth the hassle?
~ Yoga class was great
~ but my right arm is in really poor shape
~ a friend was being really shitty and really upset me (and look, she had reason to feel what she was feeling, but her response to her feelings was extremely insulting and hurtful)
~ but Bethan leapt to my defence when she didn’t have to
~ Cambridge lost the boat race
~ but I am cooking a roast chicken with roast sweet potatoes, carrots, capsicum, red onion, tomatoes and garlic, with spinach fried with bacon and leeks, and a white wine and cream sauce
~ and I have wine and mead
~ and the finale of In The Flesh is on tonight
~ and it’s International Hug a Medievalist Day
~ and I have my own medievalist to hug
…that Bethan is a brilliant, strong, beautiful person, and I am proud and privileged to be her friend.
Thank you, you wonderful human being.
I just made a bunch of those Game of Thrones coat of arms things. I was trying to make some for characters in books BUT THEY DON’T HAVE ENOUGH SPACE FOR THE MOTTOES I WANT TO USE.
All my ridiculous problems.
Has Facebook slowed to a weird crawl and stopped loading for anyone else?
